Courtroom quotes
Posted: 25 Nov 2014, 16:41Lawyer: "Was that the same nose you broke as a child?"
◦Witness: "I only have one, you know."
◦Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"
◦Witness: "By death."
◦Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?"
◦Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?"
The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.
◦Lawyer: "What is your date of birth?"
◦Witness: "July 15th."
◦Lawyer: "What year?"
◦Witness: "Every year."
◦Lawyer: "Can you tell us what was stolen from your house?"
◦Witness: "There was a rifle that belonged to my father that was stolen from the hall closet."
◦Lawyer: "Can you identify the rifle?"
◦Witness: "Yes. There was something written on the side of it."
◦Lawyer: "And what did the writing say?"
◦Witness: "'Winchester'!"
◦Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"
◦Witness: "Gucci sweats and Reeboks."
◦Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?"
◦Witness: "No. He was wearing a mask."
◦Lawyer: "What was he wearing under the mask?"
◦Witness: "Er...his face."
◦Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?"
◦Witness: "Yes."
◦Lawyer: "And in what ways does it affect your memory?"
◦Witness: "I forget."
◦Lawyer: "You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?"
◦Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?"
◦Witness: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
◦Lawyer: "How long has he lived with you?"
◦Witness: "Forty-five years."
◦Lawyer: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?"
◦Witness: "He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'"
◦Lawyer: "And why did that upset you?"
◦Witness: "My name is Susan."
◦Lawyer: "Sir, what is your IQ?"
◦Witness: "Well, I can see pretty well, I think."
◦Lawyer: "Did you blow your horn or anything?"
◦Witness: "After the accident?"
◦Lawyer: "Before the accident."
◦Witness: "Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it."
◦Witness: "I only have one, you know."
◦Lawyer: "Now, Mrs. Johnson, how was your first marriage terminated?"
◦Witness: "By death."
◦Lawyer: "And by whose death was it terminated?"
◦Accused, Defending His Own Case: "Did you get a good look at my face when I took your purse?"
The defendant was found guilty and sentenced to ten years in jail.
◦Lawyer: "What is your date of birth?"
◦Witness: "July 15th."
◦Lawyer: "What year?"
◦Witness: "Every year."
◦Lawyer: "Can you tell us what was stolen from your house?"
◦Witness: "There was a rifle that belonged to my father that was stolen from the hall closet."
◦Lawyer: "Can you identify the rifle?"
◦Witness: "Yes. There was something written on the side of it."
◦Lawyer: "And what did the writing say?"
◦Witness: "'Winchester'!"
◦Lawyer: "What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?"
◦Witness: "Gucci sweats and Reeboks."
◦Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?"
◦Witness: "No. He was wearing a mask."
◦Lawyer: "What was he wearing under the mask?"
◦Witness: "Er...his face."
◦Lawyer: "This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at all?"
◦Witness: "Yes."
◦Lawyer: "And in what ways does it affect your memory?"
◦Witness: "I forget."
◦Lawyer: "You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?"
◦Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?"
◦Witness: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
◦Lawyer: "How long has he lived with you?"
◦Witness: "Forty-five years."
◦Lawyer: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?"
◦Witness: "He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'"
◦Lawyer: "And why did that upset you?"
◦Witness: "My name is Susan."
◦Lawyer: "Sir, what is your IQ?"
◦Witness: "Well, I can see pretty well, I think."
◦Lawyer: "Did you blow your horn or anything?"
◦Witness: "After the accident?"
◦Lawyer: "Before the accident."
◦Witness: "Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it."