Carers Chill4us | Carers message board

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I was reading the article on the front page about male carers and maybe selfishly as a female carer i hadn't thought of extra difficulties it may throw up being a male carer.

How do you manage gentlemen with caring for a wife or any female relation? Does it make it awkward doing the more intimate sides of caring such as washing etc?

As a woman it socially isn't unacceptable to bed bath a husband  or father etc but for a man to do this it seems to give people pause for thought.

I know men find it difficult to ask for help and support so I wondered how you coped and what you do to get through the day.

Is Chill a predominately female membership or are we 50/50?

Thinking of you

hu****

Personally speaking, I looked after a man, my dear late Dad - there were times when I had to carry out some personal tasks - I always (I think/hope) asked him if he minded before I did anything to give him the feeling of being in control. If it did bother him he didn't show it - he was too much of a gentleman  though I know it must have been embarassing for him at times, but can only suppose being family, and as I put it to him it was "payback" for all that he had done for me when I was little.. ?

I can only think how a woman/wife might be perceived as being more vulnerable?

I have been reading the article,I never gave it a thought about a man caring for his wife,we have a neighbour who cares for his wife,but I never see him,the only time he goes out is when his son takes him shopping and somebody sits with his wife,when I have seen him he always says everything is okay,but he can't leave his wife in case she falls

Ann x